Think about medicine – what is it? Something you take in liquid or pill form on a regular or semi-regular basis to achieve some desired physiological effect. Medicine, in peoples’ minds, is in its own class. After all, pharmaceuticals aren’t like food, right? But what is medicine really? It’s simply a chemical that one exposes one’s body to for a certain length of time in order to change something inside the body. The question is this: if medicine can do that, couldn’t anything?

Antiperspirants, I believe, contain chemicals that clog the pores, as well as soak up any moisture that does get produced. Those chemicals are applied to the skin, which means it’s very easy for the body to take them in. Medicine? No, but could those chemicals not have an effect on the body in the same way a pill can? And, for those of you who wear antiperspirant, you expose yourselves to those chemicals every day. Along with all the crazy stuff we put in soaps, body washes, shampoos, conditioners, perfumes, body sprays, lotions, skin creams, etc. What’s the difference between a medical cream, and any other type of skin cream? Both get absorbed.

It’s just funny that we get crazy, one chemical at a time. Remember the trans-fat uproar? The bisphenol-A uproar? It’s not news that we use toxic chemicals for everything around us every single day. We’re simply told that we use them in small enough amounts that it won’t hurt us. But here’s what I’m getting at – how small an amount of some chemical is in a 5mg tablet? And most of us don’t take pills every single day. But we do take artificial flavors, dyes, perfumes, etc. – all kinds of unnaturally-occurring chemicals – into our bodies every day… and we’re to believe there’s no cumulative effect?

I don’t buy it.

This line of thinking is also behind some peoples’ idea of food as medicine. There’s really no difference – food contains chemicals that make our bodies work a certain way. Most peoples’ diet today is bad enough that it’s not all too different from taking statins every day when you don’t have a cholesterol problem… The Western diet really does just boil down to taking the wrong medicine.

I called up the insurance company (The Hartford, through Wachovia), where we have our company’s general liability policy, and I changed the address on the policy, because we moved. Well, that address change resulted in a new bill of $18.00, but the retards sent our bill to the old address, so it didn’t get here in time, and I was charged a late fee of $20. So I cut a check for $18, and wrote a letter that said, “Hey guys, the address change I made resulted in this new bill, so it would make sense that the new bill should go to the new address. I’m not paying the late fee. Take it off.”

Well, they sent me another bill, with another late fee! So I called up, and I got their automated system, with no option to go to a real person. So, after trying my luck with the automated system for a while, I got frustrated, and on one menu, it read off my choices, and asked me to make a selection.

Automated System: Please make a selection.
Me: I HATE YOU.
Automated System: So you want to speak with an insurance specialist. Is that correct?
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHA. Yes.

The insurance specialist came on the line and waived my late fees. Joy.

Don’t ever eat Szechuan Bean Curd. If it sounds gross, yeah, that’s because it is. Don’t think you’re brave by trying it. If you can stomach tofu, go for General Tso’s tofu. That shit is bangin’.

On the upside, here’s my fortune cookie fortune:

In god we trust; all others must pay cash.

And of course it’s surrounded by those little smiley faces, like fortune cookie fortunes sometimes are.

life’s a bowl of stress noodles seasoned with trouble.

Unsung reply to a letter
The rest of the world missed

If you died tomorrow
Your song would live forever
And here is this

Unsung reply to a letter
The rest of the world missed

The rest of the world missed

At a place down by the river
I can hear the water drowning out these words
It’s sad when you’re all alone
All the angels will be crying
When they take you home

On scraps of notebook paper
This letter I will savor
As I write

Too bad you can’t get back what’s out of sight
You grow up and move on

Grow up and move on

I am stuck here in this bedroom
And I’m thinking of tomorrow’s children
Their songs will always be sung

And know that time will only make the music get better

Hey, why don’t you know you are too good for the world?

You are destined never to die
But always to live
Through the music

And way down by the ocean
The big picture is easier to see

It’s great when you understand

There’s no problem that can’t be fixed
By a long walk in the sand

If you die tomorrow
Your song would live forever

basically, everyone has the same tendencies; some of us just have better self control (or a more heightened fear of certain outcomes).

Fear can play a huge role in the way you behave with other people.

it’s like when people put a bunch of bumper stickers on their cars. they’re put there randomly sometimes, or on a whim, but when people are behind a car with bumper stickers, they judge the driver by the stickers. it’s natural. peace sign? fucking hippie. pro-life sticker? abortion clinic bomber. you get the idea. people go on what they see. you give them only one kind of clue, and they see you as only one kind of person.

throw them too many mixed signals, though, and you really fuck them up. here’s about where the misdirection starts. guess what? … … … chicken butt.

every once in a while, it’s true. i’ve lost so much sleep the past couple weeks though, so this was bound to happen. there are so many people in my life, and so much to keep up with. there’s a lot of work to do, and there’s a lot of world to save.

but i crossed saving the world off my list. i realize something: the world can save itself. people can save themselves. some need guidance, some need trust, some need truth, and some just need a kick in the face, but everyone’s capable of doing what they need to do in order to function at their best, even if all that means is seeking the proper assistance.

i’m pretty sick of the save the day pattern, as if i actually ever gave a shit what happened to anyone once they got better. i left so many people behind in the wake of my selfishness, but the feeling of loss for me is abstract enough to have mattered little.

but, the way i feel changes minute-to-minute, so whatever.